Tag Archives: IPHONE

It has taken me a long time to visit an Apple Store. Despite my involvement in the industry for a few years now and a more recent conversion to iOS for my smartphone needs and Mac OS for my desktop requirements, I had looked at the Apple Store experience from afar and presumed that it would be as good as everyone says it is.

The opportunity to visit the Apple Store in Regent Street came up today and my son and I knew this would be one of the highlights of our family day out to London. My wife and daughter were not so keen, but knew what it meant to us so gave us an hour to have a look around while they did girlie things and looked in shops where only females understand why the prices are so high.

So, we walked in and prepared to experience the Apple magic. The products were spaced out to a degree that made a mockery of the floor space available; gleaming silver products that commanded attention from the hoards thronging through the store. Apple employees in pale blue T-shirts sauntered around with just a hint of smugness mixed with a look of regret that suggested they wanted to be badged an ‘Apple Genius’, but had so far not made the grade. The store was as clean as a hospital (I do mean clean, not MRSA dirty) and everything had been created to enhance the shopping experience and create an atmosphere that made the customer feel part of a special crowd.

It was the crowd that bothered me.

Despite all of the wonderful products, clever retail floor design and helpful employees, at no point did I feel part of the Apple crowd. My BHS shirt, Tesco jeans and All Stars trainers looked out of placed in a sea of designer clothing, thick rimmed glasses and hair that had been styled to the point that it would not move. I generalise here, but the crowd in the store felt like the kind of people I usually do not associate with. They are not deep enough, they worry too much about how they look and what others think of them. They are dull and prefer to be led rather than lead.

I felt like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman when she visited Rodeo Drive the first time although to be fair I don’t think anyone thought I was a female prostitute. I just felt out of place; I wasn’t going to spend £254 on a pair of not very good headphones, I wasn’t going to sit while a man presented to a huge crowd of people how to insert an image in Pages and I just wanted to leave as quick as I could.

It’s rare that I feel out of place anywhere and even when the snotty, but quite attractive, sales assistant in Harrods asked me not to touch the Vertu mobile phone that I was never going to pay £6,500 for I didn’t feel as distanced as I did in the Apple Store.

The Apple Store was like Stepford Wives, but with Stepford customers trying to live a dream Apple has created for them and Stepford employees who dare not put a foot out of place. I realise that this store is in a very wealthy part of London, but couldn’t shake the feeling that, despite owning and appreciating some Apple products, I am not what Apple would call an ‘Apple Person’. And I am grateful that I never will be.

And even if I am not an Apple person, at least Apple knows exactly where I am…